11 months has passed..
It was something really memorable for me..
Until today, i never forget what happened..

Back to blog again.. 1st pic.. the bomb alaska that i made.. it tasted like SUGAR only.. really really sweet..

Look at my eyes again.. i refuse to make contact to looking at the camera or the camera man.. This was taken after Yu Ying told me that i have to take a pic of myself.. so i took lor.. hahaha.. with a donut all the way from sydney.. Krispy Kreme.. SUPER SWEET.. hahaha..

Anyway, had a fruitful week this wk bah i suppose..
As of now, i only have 2 more wks in tafe and BYE BYE!!
HELLO BOX 3 = WORK!!!
HELLO SINGAPORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Labels: Australia, tafe

Q1 : The person who tagged you was?
Ans: Yong Gao

DQ2 : Your relationship with her?
Ans: Anikis of 4-kage

DQ3 : Your 5 impression of him?
Ans: Idiot, Stupid, Crazy, Joker and Full of crap?.. LOL.. nah..
Kind, fun, someone who's really loyal to his mates, nice to talk to and he's my best mate =)

Q4 : The most memorable thing he has done for you?
Ans: Everything we've done together has been good =) a few will be Studying tgt for Os, hanging out during christmas eve, christmas and sending me off at the airport =)

Q5 : If he becomes your lover , you would .....
Ans: i will hmmm.. go to gay pub with him??.. LOL

Q6 : If he becomes your lover , he needs to improve on?
Ans: Nth much.. he is gd for who he is..

Q7 : If he becomes your enemy , you would .....
Ans: Try my best to salvage this brotherhood at all cost..

Q8 : If he becomes your enemy , he needs to improve on?
Ans: Nth..

Q9 : If he becomes your enemy , the reason would be?
Ans: He must have his own reasons bah.. probably i'm too full of crap or i betrayed him..

Q10 : The most desired thing you want for he to be?
Ans: Hmmm.. to be a great man of society and with success.. running the race with me..

Q11 : Your overall impression of him?
Ans: Idiot.. Baka..

Q12 : How do you think others would think of you?
Ans: It's their mind.. i have no control over it..

Q13 : The character(s) you love about yourself?
Ans: ermm.. i'm not sure even.. most prob is bcoz i am who i am bah..

Q14 : The character(s) you hate about yourself?
Ans: A lot of things.. we are human beings, we are never satisfied creatures..

Q15 : The most ideal person you wanna be?
Ans: I wanna be who God wants me to be..

Q16 : For people that care & love you , what would you wanna say to them?
Ans: After coming to Australia, i've realised that i did not treasure u guys when i was in Singapore.. i just want to apologise for my aggressiveness all along.. Hope to catch up with u all soon.. Love u all =)

Q17 : Pass this quiz on to 7 people that you wish to know how they feel about you ...
Ans:
1) Kapo
2) Hui Xian
3) Yu Ying
4) Xin Ping
5) Yvonne Tay
6) Cheng Chin
7) Ms Wong

Labels: Quizzz

It's 4.03am now in my time-zone over here in Perth..
I was about to sleep and i've decided to browse through my sms inside my phone..
Reading all the sms that i've saved the past few mths..

Majority of it like 70% of the sms is from the same person whom i feel there is a need to save the sms from..
I just was reading it and thinking about what i've been telling her and what she has been telling me the past few mths..
And also.. making some observations on how thing's have changed comparing last time and now..
I somehow just felt really uneasy just reading about it..

Reason??
Very simple..
it's the observations i've made of the differences..
Apparently, i just realised that i've been really selfish towards her..
No matter how many times i've said sorry..
I still end up doing the same things again..
No matter how many times i've hurt her..
She still has always been there for me by my side.. Regardless of how busy she has been..
No matter how many times i was down..
She has always been with me all this while..
Just that bcoz of my thoughts and selfishness..
I felt that i was ignored..

In actual fact..
SHE HAS BEEN THERE ALL ALONG!!!!
how can i be so blind????!!!!??!?!?
how can i be so bad to say about her infront of my friends last time??
What a jerk am i to say that about someone whom i love so much and treats me really well all this while??

Must it come to an extent that i lose her like how i lost my best gal-mate then i'll learn again??
Once is enough.. i don't need another..
I can't afford to lose anyone else..

As i read the sms..
The more i read it..
The more i felt the emotions and feelings into it..
It seems to me that it's not like an ordinary sms..
But it's sms that cares and encourages..
That really shows concern and love to me..

Why didn't i felt it earlier??
If i were more sensitive to her feelings instead of bothering mine..
I wouldn't have realised it at this point of time..

Will it be too late for me to realised it just now???
Or do i still have the time to change and treasure her always..??
Will i make it on time to show her how much she means to me??
Or will it be too late again??

I wonder....

Labels: Thoughts and Feelings

Today i almost died in the large scale kitchen..
It was our function menu today and we were bout 86 booked..
AND I WAS ALL ALONE IN THE ENTREE SECTION!!!

BJ left me in the beginning..
Marlene left me halfway thru..
But thanks to everyone else for helping me out during service..
It really was a breeze..

And again, i was wondering..
Why is it that i keep on having a lot of sad thoughts inside my head recently..
i must somehow change this part of me now..
Let's see how it goes people..

Tmr having bar theory test,
Wed having chicken dish practical test..
Thurs having bar cocktail and coffee test
Friday having Hot and Cold Desserts Theory test..
Wish me all the best bah =)

Well, after clearing all my assignments..
I'm bored..
I was chatting to kaili and she suggested to me bout coming to blog..
So i've decided to come and blog bah..

She wanted me to blog about my feelings towards going back to singapore..
But i suppose i'm gonna not only blog about it..
Gonna blog bout what i did these 2 days as well bah..

These 2 days can say it's crucial to me..As usual on every fridays, i go to victoria park for badminton..
And over there, i used to think that going there is boring..
No, no no.. let me rephrase it..
PLAYING BADMINTON IN AUSTRALIA IS BORING!!!..
But ystd, i played against this guy named jon..
He’s a Singaporean, in his mid 20s..
A student from curtin uni..

Played against him..
He is a very strong player..
And obviously i got trashed by him..
But after losing to him so badly,
He did not look down on me at all..
But instead, came and talked to me..
About how should i improve on..
Just seeing him reminds me of a group of people..
They are my seniors in MSL last time..
I got reminded of Wei Li, You Long, Zhi Hong, Seng Hong and Alan..
Who are my seniors and taught me a lot about badminton..
And surprisingly, i finally realised why did i decided to stick to badminton last time..
It was bcoz of the warmth i get from everyone last time..
And playing with jon ystd brought back the feeling that i used to have..
It was that awesome feeling..
It seriously brought back my love towards it..

And so what i’ve decided to do for now?..
I’ve decided to start training in badminton again..
But before that..
Back to the basics.. Which is fitness and footwork..
I can’t start in Australia now due to my busy lifestyle over here..
But i’m gonna start it in Singapore..
Gonna do a lot of running and physical activities..
To train my stamina up and my arm power as well as my bouncing on the court..
Gotta train my recovery pace and speed as well..
Gotta get my smashes stronger and sharper as well..
Overall in short.. IT’S EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kai li asked me to blog about my feelings about going back to Singapore..
Surprisingly, i’ll be going back in exactly 4 wks time..
Inside now, i don’t want to think about returning..
There is this part of me that wants to go back and another part that doesn’t..
It’s a very bad feeling..
Not nice at all..
It’s like being really un-decisive and not sure of what i really want..

Labels: Australia, Singapore, Thoughts and Feelings

Hey guys, back to blog again..
Firstly, just wanna take this time to thank everyone who has been cheering me up and encouraging me the past few weeks.
Especially Weishan, Yong Gao, Yong Jian and all the Juniors whom came online just to chat with me to make me feel better or tagged my tagboard like xinping, hweeming, kai li, yu ying etc..

And what i'm gonna do now?
I've decided to let her go already..
I've decided to forget about whatever that has happened and carry on with life..
Decided to stay positive as well..

Weishan was right, gotta stay postive..
She kept on saying it to my brain like 1000000 TIMES!!!
So that i can remember it..

Talking about weishan..
I smsed her before my presentation just now..
Smsed her again after my class..
And i called her all the way to singapore..
I just suddenly want to call and chit chat with her..
She was having a workshop with Adam Khoo,
And was on the way to CWP for dinner i suppose..
Not going in depth into what we talked bout..
But after she telling meabout her change of course this and that..
Or shld i said.. after her exams..
I feel weishan has changed a lot already..
To a positive side bah in my opinion..

Anyway, forget about all the past already.. it's history..
Now gonna blog about the present..
I've been side tracking just now too much.. hahaha..
School has been a challenging week so far..
With all those things that i have to do..
Had to submit my a la carte menu today..
Had to present my promote products and services today
Had to submit my portfolio today..
Had to do theory test on poulty and game today.. =.="
AND.. I'VE SURVIVED.. hahahahaha..

Monday's large scale was initially boring..
As usual, i did the bread rolls again and it was good =)
Did the "dragon fire" which was chinese vegetables for the veg section..
As i was the only one who can "do the wok"..
And i managed to do 2 in one go.. haha..
And the veg really breathe fire..
I did it on purpose.. Heated up the oil,
had some water in the veg..
THROW INTO THE WOK.. AND.....
"KABOOM!!!!" BIG FIRE as i stir fry it..
shld take pic or video nxt time..

Ok.. back to dessert section..
I was bored.. Chef showed me how to present fruits more beautifully..
Initially, when plated my 1st platter of fruits.. i thought it was gorgeous already..
Here it is..

Another take afte some rearrangements.. haha.. nice??

Side view.. hehehe.. overall, i'm satisfied with te results and effort i've put in..

Anyway, found this tpic and though i post it up.. i think it was last week, Sue and Sebestian challenged me to carry coffee cups.. they said i could carry the most 3.. in the end, i carried 6 cups with 1 additional side plate inbetween somewhere.. spot it urself?? hahaha..

Up close picture of it.. wanted to balance more.. but didnt have enough cups at that time.. Awesome stuff eh??.. haha..

Anyway, gonna blog till here.. really tired now..
All those hardwork the past 2 wks was finally paid off..

Good night people..

I'm back to blog again..
Just wanna blog about my life..
I know in the previous few posts that i've stated that i'm not doing well at all..
But i think i'm feeling a bit better already..
After talking to all my close ones like WS, YG and YJ..
I've let all my feelings out to them already..
But WS seems to be ignoring me.. maybe she can't reply since she's in singapore..
But she really was there when i needed her..

I may be feeling better, but i'm still not well mentally and emotionally..
and it's really draining me physically as well..
Especially enduring so many long hours everyday doing my assignments..
Soon, i'll be free from them..
But none of my problems or troubles are related to my assignments at all..
It's basically related to family? Finance? Friends?.. the 3 Fs

Out of the past few days, i must say that ystd and friday has been better days for me..
Because i've learnt a lot..
From my chef, from jeffery and from my best gal mate..
I've learnt about being in hospitality..
You gotta be either aggressive or assertive.. never passive..
You gotta be cunning, be a professional liar and have to backstab people as well to survive..
That's what being in hospitality is all about..
But i don't like the part about lying or backstabbing..
I need to find an alternative to it..

Anyway, gonna post a few pics about recent happenings..

Apple stack pancakes.. brilliant stuff =) tons and tons of sugar.. looks beautiful as well..

I'll usually blog during this time of everyweek..
And usually i'll have tons of things to blog about and tons of things to say..
But as of now, there is only 1 thing in my mind..

It's regarding a friendship that i've lost..
A very important one..
Apparently what's the reason for it??
The only one who's at fault will be me bah..
She treated me really well,
she helped me a lot when i was in my times of needs..

We were looking forward to go out together in december for shopping..
She was suppose to give me a make over,
but i've sinned..
I've said something to her that i can never take back already..
And it left an extremely deep impact on her..
Those words really impacted her really hard deeply..
and now, she really hates me for it..

The past week without her..
It seems like a part of my life was missing..
I went to her blog just now..
I read about what she wrote to me..
And immediately, i went to for a shower..
But something just never stop flowing out..
Finally when it stopped,
i kept on blaming myself for whatever has happened..

I've learnt a lot from this incident..
It's all about being sensitive to someone's feelings..
It's always like this.. I always talk without thinking..
And now, something BIG has happened..
Only then i started to learn..
I seriously don't know whether is it a good or bad thing even..
It's a too big price for me to pay already..

Seriously speaking,
she was always with me by my side..
But i did not treasure her..
I also don't know how to face her now..

To my best gal-mate:
I thought we were really close.. that's y we were open talk about it..
Seems like despite that,
there's still a boundary and a limit that cannot be touched or crossed..
Seriously, i'm really sorry for what i've said to you..
If you chose to ignore me from today onwards,
it's totally ok, bcoz it was my fault totally from the very beginning..
I never blame u for hating me..
But u just left me like that alone when i needed someone to talk to the most..
Just now as i was on msn, trying to find someone whom i can talk to about what happened..
The pain that was deep inside..
There was none that was there for me out of the 500 over msn contacts i have..
But i just remembered that you were always there for me..

Good luck in your future..
If we are fated to cross paths once again,
then let it be..
But Thanks for being by my side all these few months..
Take care =)
Ben